Last week, my college roommate Jessica called me while I was sitting at my kitchen table, surrounded by a mountain of math journals and my laptop open to three different tabs of B.E.S.T. standards. "Why are you still working?" she asked. "It's 9 PM on a Sunday!"

I tried to explain about progress monitoring and how I needed to update my small groups before Monday, but I could hear it in her voice. That polite confusion. That "bless your heart" tone that says she thinks I'm a little crazy.

And you know what? She's not wrong. We ARE a little crazy. But that's exactly why we need friends who get it.

The Loneliness of Being Misunderstood

Here's the thing nobody tells you about teaching: it can be incredibly isolating, even when you're surrounded by 25 kids all day.

Your non-teacher friends love you, pero they don't understand why you spend your own money on classroom supplies. They don't get why you're stressed about a kid who's been absent for three days, or why you're genuinely excited about finding a new way to teach fractions.

I remember my first few years at Roosevelt Elementary, eating lunch alone in my classroom because I felt like the other teachers had their groups figured out already. I was too proud to admit I was drowning, and too tired to make the effort to connect.

Big mistake, mijas. Huge.

What Teacher Friends Actually Get

Real teacher friends understand the stuff that sounds crazy to everyone else.

They get why you're celebrating because Marcus finally mastered his multiplication facts, even though he's three grade levels behind. They understand the heartbreak when you find out Sofia's family is moving mid-year, right when she was starting to trust you.

They know why you're stressed about FAST testing season, and they don't judge you when you admit you cried in your car after a particularly rough observation.

My friend Carmen and I text each other pictures of the ridiculous things we find in our classrooms. Last month it was a half-eaten sandwich stuffed inside a math textbook. The month before, it was a love letter written on the back of a permission slip.

These are the moments that make us laugh instead of lose our minds.

Where to Find Your People

If you're feeling like you're on an island, here's where to start looking for your tribe:

In Your Own Building Start small. Offer to share copies with the teacher next door. Ask someone if they want to grab coffee after school. I met my closest work friend, Yolanda, when we were both staying late trying to figure out our data tracking sheets. She showed me this tool called FastIXL that matches FAST scores to IXL skills, and I shared my color-coding system for guided reading groups.

Sometimes the best friendships start with shared frustration over paperwork.

Grade Level Teams If your school does PLCs right, this is gold. If your school does PLCs wrong (and we've all been there), try to connect with your grade level teammates outside of those meetings. Plan together, vent together, celebrate together.

Online Communities Florida teachers have some amazing Facebook groups where we share resources and support each other. But be careful, some groups are just complaint fests. Look for the ones where people are actually helping each other solve problems.

Professional Development I know, I know. Most PD is terrible. But sometimes you meet amazing teachers there. I've connected with some incredible educators during those awkward lunch breaks at conferences.

Red Flags to Avoid

Not every teacher friend is going to be good for your mental health. Watch out for:

The Constant Complainer who never wants to find solutions, just wants to drag you down with them.

The Competitive Colleague who makes everything a contest. Teaching isn't a sport, people.

The Boundary Crosser who expects you to cover their duties, share all your materials, but never returns the favor.

Trust me, I've learned this the hard way. Some people will take your generosity and give nothing back.

Building Real Connections

Here's what's worked for me over the years:

Be vulnerable first. Admit when you're struggling. Ask for help. I promise you're not the only one who doesn't have it all figured out.

Share generously. When you find something that works, pass it along. When someone shares with you, actually try it and report back.

Celebrate together. When good things happen in your classroom, share the joy. When your friend's class does something amazing, be genuinely happy for them.

Show up. If someone's having a rough day, check in. If there's a retirement party, go. Small gestures matter more than you think.

The Long Game

Building teacher friendships takes time. We're all exhausted and pulled in a million directions. But investing in these relationships will save your sanity and make you a better teacher.

My teacher friends have talked me off ledges, shared resources that saved my lessons, and reminded me why I love this crazy job when I was ready to quit.

They've also been there for the real-life stuff. When my mom was sick, they covered my lunch duty without being asked. When Marcus made honor roll, they celebrated like he was their own kid.

Making It Happen

This week, I challenge you to reach out to one person in your building. Ask them how their day went. Offer to help with something. Share a success or admit a struggle.

We're all in this together, and we're stronger when we actually act like it.

Carlos still doesn't understand why I'm texting with Carmen about lesson plans on Saturday morning. But he sees how much happier I am when I feel connected to my teacher tribe.

And honestly? That makes all the difference.

Your turn, teachers. Who's in your corner? And if the answer is nobody, what's one small step you can take this week to change that?

We need each other more than we admit. Don't try to do this alone.