Last Tuesday, I got a call from Sophia's mom at 7:30 PM. Her daughter had been crying about the upcoming FAST test, convinced she was going to fail fourth grade. "Mrs. Santos," she said, "I don't know what to tell her. I'm scared too."

That's when it hit me. After all these years of prepping my students for testing week, I'd been missing half the equation. We can't calm our kids if their parents are panicking at home.

So here's what I've learned about the parent conversation that needs to happen before we even think about sharpening those number 2 pencils.

Start with the Truth (But Make It Age-Appropriate)

I used to sugarcoat everything. "Oh, it's just another test!" But parents see right through that, and so do kids.

Now I'm honest. Yes, the FAST matters. Yes, we take it seriously. But no, it's not the only measure of their child's worth or intelligence.

I tell parents exactly what I tell my own kids: this test shows us one snapshot of what you know on one particular day. That's it. Daniela bombed her SAT the first time because she had food poisoning. Tests happen in real life, with real circumstances.

When parents understand this perspective, they stop putting so much pressure on themselves to create the "perfect" testing environment at home.

The Sleep Conversation Nobody Wants to Have

Ay, this one's tough. I have to tell parents that letting kids stay up late "studying" the night before FAST is like letting them eat candy for breakfast before a race.

But I don't just tell them what not to do. I give them a plan.

Two weeks before testing, we start shifting bedtimes earlier by 15 minutes every few days. I send home a simple chart that shows exactly when kids should be in bed based on their age. No judgment, just facts.

I also share what worked with my Marcus when he was struggling with test anxiety. We created a "boring" bedtime routine. Same time, same activities, nothing exciting. His brain learned to wind down automatically.

Parents love having specific steps to follow. It makes them feel like they're helping instead of just worrying.

The Morning Game Plan

Here's what I learned the hard way: parents need a script for testing mornings.

I send home a one-page guide with exactly what to say and what not to say. Things like "You've got this" instead of "Do your best" (which adds pressure). Or "I'm proud of you no matter what" instead of "This test is really important."

The breakfast conversation is huge too. I tell parents to stick with whatever their child normally eats. Testing week is not the time to introduce brain-boosting smoothies or special "smart" cereals. Familiar foods equal comfort.

And please, por favor, no last-minute drilling on math facts in the car. I've seen kids arrive at school more anxious because mom decided to quiz them on multiplication tables during the drive.

What to Do with All That Nervous Energy

Parents always ask me: "How do I help if I can't actually help with the test?"

Here's what I tell them. Your job isn't to teach content the week before FAST. Your job is to be the calm, steady presence your child needs.

That might mean extra hugs. Maybe it's letting them sleep with the dog for a few nights. Or keeping their favorite snack stocked in the pantry.

One mom told me she started doing jigsaw puzzles with her daughter every evening during testing week. No talking about school, just quiet time together. Her daughter's scores went up, but more importantly, she stopped having stomachaches.

The Data Conversation (Yes, Already)

I've started preparing parents for what happens after FAST scores come back. Because that conversation is just as important as the pre-test one.

I explain that I'll be looking at their child's results to plan targeted support. When I use tools like FastIXL to match FAST scores to specific skills we need to work on, I'm not looking for problems. I'm looking for next steps.

Parents need to know that lower scores don't mean failure. They mean information. And information helps us help their kids.

I also warn them that scores might surprise them, both good and bad. The kid who struggles with homework might shine on test day. The straight-A student might have an off morning. Both scenarios are normal.

The Follow-Up That Matters

Here's something I wish I'd started doing years ago: I check in with families during testing week.

Not about how the test went. We can't discuss that anyway. But I send a quick text or email asking how everyone's holding up. Sometimes parents need permission to feel stressed too.

And after scores come back, I don't just send them home in a folder. I schedule brief phone calls or meetings to explain what the numbers mean and what we're doing next.

Parents who understand the process become our biggest allies in helping kids grow.

Making It Real for Your Families

Every school community is different, but here's what works for my Title I families in Tampa:

I acknowledge that testing stress looks different when you're worried about rent and food and immigration status on top of FAST scores. Some of my parents didn't go to high school in this country and feel lost navigating our testing system.

So I make sure my communications are clear, translated when needed, and focused on what parents can actually control. I also connect families with our school counselor and community resources when test anxiety is really about bigger worries.

The Real Talk

Listen, I'm not going to pretend that one parent conversation will eliminate all testing stress. But I've seen what happens when parents feel informed and supported instead of anxious and helpless.

Kids pick up on everything. When parents approach FAST week with calm confidence instead of panic, children do too.

After 22 years of this, I've learned that preparing families is just as important as preparing students. Maybe more important.

So reach out to your parents this week. Give them something concrete to do. Let them know you're all on the same team.

And remember, we've got this. All of us together.